In fast-paced, high-stress environments like hospitality, chaos can erupt at any moment—an unexpected guest complaint, a staff shortage, a delay in service. For Chef Rey P. Parreño II, Certified Hospitality Professional and Executive Chef of Florita’s Cavite, one leadership skill consistently makes the difference between panic and performance: emotional control.
“Your team takes cues from you,” he told Financial Adviser PH. “If you lose your temper, the room follows. But if you stay calm and composed, even under pressure, they stay focused and find a way through it.”
Chef Rey has worked in both traditional and modern kitchens, adapting his leadership style over the years. While he acknowledges that shouting used to be a norm in many kitchens, he believes the best leaders today lead by presence, not pressure. In his own team, silence during peak hours isn’t a red flag—it’s a sign of focus. “When the team is briefed well, trusts each other, and knows you won’t explode at the first mistake, they perform better. It creates clarity, not confusion.”
This principle applies beyond kitchens. Whether in front office operations, hotel management, or event coordination, leaders who can regulate their emotions create an environment where others feel safe to think, act, and recover—even when things go wrong.
Rey says emotional control doesn’t mean bottling everything up—it means choosing your response instead of reacting impulsively. “You can be firm without being aggressive. You can correct without belittling. You can lead without yelling.”
Developing emotional control also allows leaders to navigate difficult decisions—like handling conflicts or letting go of underperforming staff—with professionalism and respect. “It’s not about being soft. It’s about being intentional. The calmest voice in the room is usually the one that gets heard.”
In his experience, teams led by emotionally grounded leaders tend to be more resilient, loyal, and motivated. “They don’t fear the job. They’re proud of the work. That difference comes from leadership that’s steady, not volatile.”
His advice to aspiring leaders?
“Anyone can give instructions. But not everyone can hold the room together when things fall apart. If you want your team to stay focused in chaos, start by mastering your own emotions.”
